My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
