I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
