I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
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