He is an equal opportunity slut.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize