Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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