According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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