She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
