Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
