u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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