Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Randomize
