finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
