let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
