Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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