I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
