what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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