ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Less talking, more tequila
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
