More tranny stories later!
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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