So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Holy sore nipples Batman
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
