is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
