some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize