kristin has been a bad kristin
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
