I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
