I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize