that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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