I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
