you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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