Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
