I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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