Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
