Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
