I wanna passion pit in your ass
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize