I looked at my own cervix.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
