this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Pooping to opera.
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