Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
