I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
PANTIES FOUND
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
