i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize