nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
