Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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