Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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