ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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