If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
ugly people sure do ruin things
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize