ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Green mimosas i think yes
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize
