I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
