I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
