I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
