I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
