yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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