I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
