I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
