What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
whose parrot is this?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
