No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Randomize